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Letter to my lil' bro
Jan. 6th, 2015 08:42 am...regarding a certain cat toy he purchased for my Phellonie during his latest visit. The visit ended when I came down with the flu.
"So. I think I am over the flu. But...I must speak to you about robotic cat toys that make bird chirps.
It started late in the night. I was still feverish, so it was happening for a while before it registered what I was hearing. A bird, screaming for it's little mechanical life. Over and over. Closer and closer. It seemed to take forever. It would come close, so close, to my room and then seem to fling itself farther away, farther, until I could not even hear it anymore. I would almost strain to hear it, but nothing. As I would sink back down into fevered dreams though, I would hear it again, like a tiny squealing harbinger of doom, getting closer and closer again. The tiny shrieks, then silence, then tiny shrieks again, then a flurry of tiny shrieks, closer and closer. Then it was in my room. Being carried around none to carefully in a mouth apparently, because at times it seemed muffled. Now it was accompanied by rapid scurrying of claws skidding across my wooden floor, and slight plopping noises as it was being flung from one side of the room to the other, hitting the floor and crying out it's maddening never-fucking-ending death cries. I sat up, in the dark, but I could see it's green eyes flashing as it winged from one side of the room to the other. Foolishly I must have closed my eyes in exhaustion. Because suddenly the foul thing flew through the air and hit me in my closed eye, as expertly shot as if by a hockey player trying to score in double overtime.
The mouse ended up in the front hall closet after I got up and trudged through the house with it. The cat vanished.
I slept.
And then, this morning. I heard it. More terrifying than Poe's "Tell Tale Heart". The little fucker lives. I just heard it go by my room. Muffled. So the little bitch hunted all night and found it, and is stalking my bedroom door with it in her mouth again.
Thank you for her joy."
"So. I think I am over the flu. But...I must speak to you about robotic cat toys that make bird chirps.
It started late in the night. I was still feverish, so it was happening for a while before it registered what I was hearing. A bird, screaming for it's little mechanical life. Over and over. Closer and closer. It seemed to take forever. It would come close, so close, to my room and then seem to fling itself farther away, farther, until I could not even hear it anymore. I would almost strain to hear it, but nothing. As I would sink back down into fevered dreams though, I would hear it again, like a tiny squealing harbinger of doom, getting closer and closer again. The tiny shrieks, then silence, then tiny shrieks again, then a flurry of tiny shrieks, closer and closer. Then it was in my room. Being carried around none to carefully in a mouth apparently, because at times it seemed muffled. Now it was accompanied by rapid scurrying of claws skidding across my wooden floor, and slight plopping noises as it was being flung from one side of the room to the other, hitting the floor and crying out it's maddening never-fucking-ending death cries. I sat up, in the dark, but I could see it's green eyes flashing as it winged from one side of the room to the other. Foolishly I must have closed my eyes in exhaustion. Because suddenly the foul thing flew through the air and hit me in my closed eye, as expertly shot as if by a hockey player trying to score in double overtime.
The mouse ended up in the front hall closet after I got up and trudged through the house with it. The cat vanished.
I slept.
And then, this morning. I heard it. More terrifying than Poe's "Tell Tale Heart". The little fucker lives. I just heard it go by my room. Muffled. So the little bitch hunted all night and found it, and is stalking my bedroom door with it in her mouth again.
Thank you for her joy."
